On-call "Locum" - Any Takers?

Anyone wants to take over my call duty? With 3 of my colleagues recently taken off the medical officer pool to begin specialist duties, there're at least 32 extra calls to be had by the rest of us. Of course, I'm not terribly excited about this. At my age, my body (and soul!) doesn't take to exhaustion so kindly anymore. I suffer from pre-call depression, finding myself unable to have any fun the night before my on-call day lest I be punished for my good times with endless admissions and a night long of cardiac arrests and multiple other emergencies. I suffer from on-call lethargy, finding great difficulty even climbing out of bed to begin what could be the longest day (and night) of my life, as well as on-call anorexia, partly somatic, but mostly understandable given the inferior standards of the on-call meals provided. I also suffer on-call acute irrationalism, but this mainly concerns my superstitious behaviour (and not clinical judgement) - I abstain from wearing any bright, cheery colours; my on-call attire has remained consistent in my years of service. Only the gloomiest and most dull colours for me, thank you. I have even made my on-call house-officers change their shirts - what audacity, turning up in my wards in red and its family of hues! Finally, I suffer from post-call migraine, dehydration and bad-hair/skin. I also don't smile at patients that much and most certainly would not be in the mood to make small talk with them (I usually do).

So, anyone interested to take over some of my calls? It's after all RM 150 per on-call and an extra RM 20 on weekends (sarcasm very much intended).